Forcing myself...

(5 minutes gone)

I am forcing myself...

Really forcing myself...

Forcing myself to show my cold blood face when I meet her...

I saw her picture in Facebook randomly...

Without seconds, I closed the tab...

I know that...

I need to do that...

I need to...

I need to forget her...

She is just a common friend...

A friend...

A usual friend...

For many times and many months...

Feeling myself is just like a stupid...

Yeah...

Months before...

She just treated me as a tool...

A tool...

I shall know the truth since months before...

Just cant imagine why I cant back to reality during that time...

Addicted to SORRY by Jonas Brothers...

(see her online status)

I just cant forgive her...

And myself too...

Hurted?

Maybe...

We are not as close as before...

Thats what I can tell you and myself...

Just a small action and it tells everything...

I think...

I am still finding the meaning of friend...

And seriously...

I cant find the meaning from you anymore...

Since I saw your truth face...

Can I just ignore your sms about the mooncake festival?

I am forcing myself...

Forcing myself...

(You make me crazier, crazier, crazier...)

I need to find something to do...

Everything... Many thing...

I learnt many things throughout this few months...

As usual...

Things related to friendship, love, relationship, and studies...

My lecturer asked me a good question before...

Have you ever change since you started your university life?

And my answer is YES...

Compared to before...

I am becoming more mature in handling some problems...

Problems that make me feel sick...

Many friends are around me throughout my hard time...

And I am so happy...

And proud...

For having such a gang of friends...

Not going to mention all of them but be more specific...

Hor Lap tells me that he is reliable...

Without you, I think I cant go through the tough time...

Dan Tart (and the gang) tells me that he is simple and reliable...

No matter what happened...

He is going to lend me his ear...

Ling Siaw also tells me that he is independent and reliable...

Accompanying me when I was happy and down...

Proud to have such friend...

Wei Chuan tells me the meaning of happiness...

Just a simple girl...

And others...

Some friends...

You cant ignore that...

Some is selfish...

Some is in fact just a noob but pretend to be a pro...

Since she is getting out of my life...

Another friend is almost getting out of my life too...

She taught me a good lesson...

A good lesson on how reality is such the world...

Some friends told me that you are great...

And you give me a good impression on my mind...

Since that incident...

I have a new and better understanding on you...

LIAR!!!

Parents told me that it was not all her fault...

You need to be responsible for that too...

But I think...

I think...

I cant accept that...

Studies...

Exam just over and nothing to say...

No matter whats the result...

I can accept that...

Because...

At least I tried my best...

Not going to say tired anymore...

Because I know that...

When I was down...

I still have them...

FRIENDS...

and lets scream FEARLESS!!!

When you say nothing at all...

Many things happened recently...

Time to action...

Ok lets move out and fire in the hole...

I told myself...

I will be strong...

I can go through it...

Bruce...

Again...

You are right...

When you are doing something right...

Just FEARLESS!!!

Unfair world, friendship, back-stab...

Seriously...

Since few years ago...

I knew that...

The world is always unfair...

Unfair to someone that is good...

Those bad guys are always the winner...

I took my bath just now...

Flash back...

Just wondering...

Some of my friends in my life...

Are just fake enough...

They are great enough to smile in front of you...

And start to back-stab you...

Bruce, you are right...

They are just great when they are on your back...

Never force me to write your "beautiful" name here...

Dare to challenge me and trust me...

You will die hard...

I think you must be wondering...

How can I know that you are back-stabbing me...

Come on...

Remember my nickname???

Sniper...

Sorry if I say anything wrong...

Never trust your friend easily when they are back-stabbing someone WITHOUT REASONS...

I hate such persons...

I admit that...

I lose some of my friends...

Why?

Just because of you...

Sorry...

Is two of you...

Or maybe...

Three of you...

Don't dare to challenge me...

I will never "give face"...

Even you are a female...

Beware your attitude...

You made the mistake and dare to back-stab me...

The war...

I told myself...

I promise myself...

I need to calm down...

At last...

The war ended...

Or I can say that...

Half time...

Finals are coming soon...

But I need a rest...

Tired...

Just like Wayne Rooney...

Scoring many goals but totally exhausted in the end of the season...

As a result...

MU cant get the champion...

Headache now...

But I am still listening to radio...

I dislike quiet...

It is scary...

Just like my heart...

I am becoming irrational...

Standing on the junction...

I have no idea what way that I need to go...

Left or right?

Or maybe straight?

I gonna slap myself...

I told myself that...

Thats all you can do...

Others?

Just leave it to the God...

I tried my best...

I did what I can...

Thats what I can tell myself...

I changed a lot...

I change to someone...

That...

Sometimes...

I cant even know who am I actually...

What happened to you kailiang?

Feel like losing everything...

I become emo easily...

Probably...

Exam just over...

I have nothing to do and I start to think negatively...

Friends are leaving for further studies...

Fattchi, Waikhan, and Hojun...

Promise me...

Until the next time we meet...

Take care and all the best...

And also...

Keep in touch...

Cos our friendships last forever...

The friendship is true...

No lies...

Flawless...

Wonderful...

I miss my secondary school moments...

3 weeks, 4 papers, tired, tough, challenge

Hi blog...

Not writing on your wall for a long time...

Many things happened throughout this few weeks...

Seriously...

I never face such tough challenge before...

Studies...

Friendship...

She "get out" from my life...

At least until now...

You are not my friend anymore...

As I said before...

Attitude decides everything...

The moment you tell me the words...

I know that...

Our friendship had ended...

Never feel so relax for such a long time...

Angela told me that I became a panda already...

My mom said that I am thinner...

And even I feel myself is getting older, older and older while looking on the mirror...

Sometimes...

I just ask myself...

When will the war end???

Someone is making me emo...

Be more specific...

A female... As mentioned before...

Without reason...

Mind is becoming clearer...

I need to be tough...

Cos I know that...

It is still a long way to go...

I always glad of something...

Friendship...

Nicholas told me before...

Kailiang...

You are great...

Your friends are distributed everywhere in university...

Proud of your words man...

Throughout the war...

Throughout these few weeks...

When I was down...

When I felt sad...

When I wanna cry...

Friends...

You are the one that cheer me up...

Thanks for your listening...

The motivation for me to carry out my life (so serious huh?)

Blessing...

Everything, miracle, love, friendship, MD,...

At last, I decide to write something on my wall.

Many things happened on these few days.

And I emo for these few day.

I am not in good mood, although Spain won the World Cup.

Casillas and Jesus Navas are awesome.

I knew a friend since 2 years ago.

She is quite good in studies.

The problem is that I was disappointed of you when you said that to me and others.

Your attitude is suck.

I cant imagine that.

And I cant expect that too.

You are such a disappointment.

For me, attitude is everything.

Everything is just on my opposite way.

I find myself hard to smile.

Hard to make miracle.

I found myself become irrational again.

I think I am abnormal physically and mentally.

Sometimes, I just wanna scream "What!!!???"

Fearless by Taylor Swift is not useful at all now.

I miss her.

I have feeling on her.

But, but, sometimes,

I just wonder...

Wonder that...

I have no idea on what am I writing now.

T.T

I hope that I can go through that...