Forcing myself...

(5 minutes gone)

I am forcing myself...

Really forcing myself...

Forcing myself to show my cold blood face when I meet her...

I saw her picture in Facebook randomly...

Without seconds, I closed the tab...

I know that...

I need to do that...

I need to...

I need to forget her...

She is just a common friend...

A friend...

A usual friend...

For many times and many months...

Feeling myself is just like a stupid...

Yeah...

Months before...

She just treated me as a tool...

A tool...

I shall know the truth since months before...

Just cant imagine why I cant back to reality during that time...

Addicted to SORRY by Jonas Brothers...

(see her online status)

I just cant forgive her...

And myself too...

Hurted?

Maybe...

We are not as close as before...

Thats what I can tell you and myself...

Just a small action and it tells everything...

I think...

I am still finding the meaning of friend...

And seriously...

I cant find the meaning from you anymore...

Since I saw your truth face...

Can I just ignore your sms about the mooncake festival?

I am forcing myself...

Forcing myself...

(You make me crazier, crazier, crazier...)

I need to find something to do...

Everything... Many thing...

I learnt many things throughout this few months...

As usual...

Things related to friendship, love, relationship, and studies...

My lecturer asked me a good question before...

Have you ever change since you started your university life?

And my answer is YES...

Compared to before...

I am becoming more mature in handling some problems...

Problems that make me feel sick...

Many friends are around me throughout my hard time...

And I am so happy...

And proud...

For having such a gang of friends...

Not going to mention all of them but be more specific...

Hor Lap tells me that he is reliable...

Without you, I think I cant go through the tough time...

Dan Tart (and the gang) tells me that he is simple and reliable...

No matter what happened...

He is going to lend me his ear...

Ling Siaw also tells me that he is independent and reliable...

Accompanying me when I was happy and down...

Proud to have such friend...

Wei Chuan tells me the meaning of happiness...

Just a simple girl...

And others...

Some friends...

You cant ignore that...

Some is selfish...

Some is in fact just a noob but pretend to be a pro...

Since she is getting out of my life...

Another friend is almost getting out of my life too...

She taught me a good lesson...

A good lesson on how reality is such the world...

Some friends told me that you are great...

And you give me a good impression on my mind...

Since that incident...

I have a new and better understanding on you...

LIAR!!!

Parents told me that it was not all her fault...

You need to be responsible for that too...

But I think...

I think...

I cant accept that...

Studies...

Exam just over and nothing to say...

No matter whats the result...

I can accept that...

Because...

At least I tried my best...

Not going to say tired anymore...

Because I know that...

When I was down...

I still have them...

FRIENDS...

and lets scream FEARLESS!!!